1. |
Rioting Heart
03:51
|
|||
Back then I fell for a girl and in the back of the bus she said
"I love you a lot but I can't love very much"
She told me love is a process and in time it would be
But I was all the more lonely when she stood next to me
It remains that over and over, every night and every day
That even though your eyes are glazed over, I fall into them anyway
And our fingers were made
With the spaces between, and
Our bodies are longing for warmth
It's my dream that
The rest of my rioting heart will wither away
Simple summer embrace me
Feel the flush on my face
Reacquaint me with movements that I had replaced
I'll trace new scenes with my fingers
New faces with my lips
Try to see through their shrugs and decode their quips
I wrote my love upon the wall there, sprawling words onto the floor
Behind a bookshelf stacked with worlds that we don't visit anymore
And I reach for a hand
I can hold for a while
They pull it away
Brush it off, force a smile
And the rest of my rioting heart will wither away
So during snowy grey days, I'm at the end of the line
Sitting next to you there, but in the back of my mind
I know you don't long for me when you're sitting alone
I'll stay cold through the night
I'm in this on my own
It remains that over and over
This is the way that it will play
That even though your eyes are glazed over, love
I fall into them, over
Over and over
So I'll hold her real tightly and sink deep into them
Envelop her nightly, here's hoping that through them
The rest of my rioting heart will wither away
So I'll hold her real tightly
And sink deep into her
And the rest of my rioting heart will decide
That it's better for it not to stay
And I hope that the last of my heart
Will wither away
|
||||
2. |
Last Year
03:48
|
|||
Would you speak more slowly?
Say "I wish I knew her when..."
Would you say something?
God, I wish I knew him then
You recall the promise
That I would move mountains
What a charming notion
I remember back when
I would do anything
I would scrape and starve and
With my body aching
Scale the spiral stairwells
Moving boxes of things
Thinking it might help
Maybe it could stop the shouting
When you say its name it disappears
Just like everything I've come to fear
When I look at myself
This time last year
I'm becoming rotten
I had taken pictures
Of unaware perversions
And had set reminders
To avoid coercion
Sew them into my cells
Follow them to the letter
But I don't feel better
When you say its name it disappears
Just like everything I've come to fear
When I look at myself
This time last year
I'm becoming rotten
When you say its name it becomes clear
Festering and poisoning my ear
It's slowly growing louder
And after all these years
I'll just keep rotting
I'll just keep rotting
I'll just keep rotting
I'll just keep on rotting
|
||||
3. |
Can't Escape It
02:41
|
|||
I can't escape it
I'm catching what you keep
When you're awake I can't sleep
I can feel your worries creep in
I can't escape it
Despair will find a home
Like a ghostly hand to hold
Like very heavy load
I know that I'm falling for you
But I'm not sure that I can handle what you're falling into
I can't escape it
Can't let go of this hurt
When the water's crisp and cool
But you only taste the dirt
I can't escape it
It's the way the scene is spun
When you wander into space
And you can't see anyone
I know that I'm falling for you
But I'm not sure that I can handle what you're falling into
And though every part of me aches
The emptiness has been the only place I feel safe
I know that I'm falling for you
But I'm not sure that I can handle what you're falling into
And though every part of me aches
The emptiness has been the only place I feel safe
I know that I'm falling for you
But I'm not sure that I can handle what you're falling into
And though every part of me aches
The emptiness has been the only place I feel safe
|
||||
4. |
Anything Else
03:52
|
|||
I tried so hard to say
Anything else, to find
The kind of love that I could
Package in a shell, and
Hope another day
It'll grow out into
Something I've lost
That I can't seem to find again
And I am sorry
I am sorry
If I could change it, I would change it
I would change, so fast
I tried so hard to find
Anything else, to have
the kind of life that would be
Possible to sell
So depend on me
To withstand
To leave behind a legacy
A steady hand
But I am sorry
I am sorry
If I could change it, I would change it
I would change, so fast
I tried so hard to be
Anyone else, to be
The type of person who could
Handle this distress
To feel less deeply to
Always be well
And as I blunder
I'm left to wonder what I was meant for
But I'm just sorry
My body is an apology
I'm a pendulum
I can't untangle whats inside of me
I am sorry
Sorry
If I could change it
I would change it
I would change
And I am sorry
Sorry
And I can't remember a time I haven't been
|
||||
5. |
Empty Heart
03:19
|
|||
Do you know where I have gone
Do you know where I've been
I have tried to save the world
But I still felt empty
I still wander through the empty streets
And compliment the dark
With my heavy leaded feet I still remain
Still remain an empty heart
The walls close in around me
And my pulse begins to race
I can feel the gnawing but it never leaves a trace
Cells divide, and us, inside
Are pulled farther away
I couldn't see you if I tried so
Maybe it's best that I stay
Falling into nowhere
Reaching out for someone out there
Falling into nowhere
When you're laughing next to me
I cannot help but fly
I glow with every hue in the
Descending evening sky
I feel fire in my gut
Until the moment that we part
And when I'm back inside my cell I still remain
Still remain
Falling into nowhere
Reaching out for someone out there
Falling into nowhere
Do you know where I have gone
Do you know where I've been
I have tried to save the world
But I still felt empty
I still wander through the empty streets
And compliment the dark
With my heavy leaded feet I still remain
Still remain an empty heart
|
||||
6. |
All There Is
04:11
|
|||
Once I tried to find love but I drop the pretense
How do you look for hope knowing only absence?
And the bitterness is spinning
Swirling ice above my head
Crystallize into the figure lying next to mine in bed
And I wonder
Is this all there really is?
Once I tried to find love but then I got too scared
Finding the one for you is impossibly rare
So if impossible it is then why waste life hoarding despair?
Entertaining possibilities that were never even there
And I wonder
Is this all there really is?
Is this all there is for me?
Is this all there's gonna be?
I am sequestered
In my own right
In my own head
In my own life
In my own bed
On my own
Once I tried to find home, but it felt like a cell
I tried to sit still and smile but I ran like hell
So I will take myself outside
And diffuse into the sky
Never to be held by anyone
Unwise enough to try
So I promise
This is all there really is
Is this all there is for me?
Is this all there's gonna be?
I am sequestered
In my own right
In my own head
In my own life
In my own bed
On my own
Is this all there is for me?
Is this all there's gonna be?
Is this all there is for me?
Is this all there's gonna be?
Is this all there is for me?
Is this all there's gonna be?
I am sequestered
In my own right
In my own head
In my own life
In my own bed
On my own
And this love is affection
On my own tongue
In my own blood
In my own lungs
Taking control
Of my own
|
||||
7. |
Another Ghost
03:02
|
|||
Falling
Falling
Falling
Keep on taking photographs
And keep on dropping names
Keep on speaking round the point
And charging by the frame
Surely when the world can see you'll
Play your sickly game again
But I'm not falling for another ghost
Keep on sending messages
And wearing yourself thin
Keep on varying the places
I see you again
Keep on searching high and low
For a familiar grin
But I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
Keep on trying to camouflage
And placing yourself right
Keep trying to be the one
I come across at night
Keep on crying out
Hoping it'll reach my ear
But I'm not falling for another ghost, my dear
I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
Try until you're good and tired to pull and hold me close
Til my soul expires, I'm not falling for a ghost, no
Keep your somber souvenirs, it's you who'll need them most, 'cause
I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
I'm not falling for another ghost
No, I'm not
Falling
No, not again
For another ghost
Falling
Falling
Falling
|
||||
8. |
Closer To You
03:10
|
|||
I've been dreaming a lot these days of
Taking busses and aeroplanes and
I've been writing down everything so
I don't get lost in the aerospace again
I've been feeling like
There is no place worth going to
Nowhere is closer to you
I've been walking through my memories
Seeing what once would compel me, but
My thoughts can't help but linger round
The overwhelming space between my body and the ground
I've been feeling like
There is no place worth going to
Nowhere is closer to you
I've been feeling like
There is no place worth going to
Nowhere is closer to you
I've been wandering out real late
Hoping that we'll both get home safe
I've been carrying on despite
Feeling chills in my blood at night
I've been feeling like
There is no place worth going to
Nowhere is closer to you
I've been feeling like
There is no place worth going to
Nowhere is closer to you
Nowhere is closer to you
|
Payphones Edmonton, Alberta
Payphones is an acoustic, alternative folk rock band from Edmonton, Alberta. Their music showcases intricately layered vocal harmonies, dynamic instrumental accompaniment, and emotional lyrics about queerness, relationships, isolation, disability, and personal growth. ... more
Streaming and Download help
If you like Payphones, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp